Growing Girl

Little L is about 7 and a half weeks old now.  We've graduated to a couple new things this week-cloth diapers, and partially because they give her a big ol' butt, size 0-3 clothes.  She is definitely growing; it was getting hard to snap her onesies even when she had on the regular diapers.  We think she's about 10 pounds now.  Almost every morning when I pick her up I think she's looks bigger.

So far the cloth diapers are going fine.  Of course our washer isn't working at the moment, waiting on someone to come out this afternoon to look at it.  Thank God for community, particularly those living on our block that are letting us use their washing machine.  Another way having a baby has changed my life-I do A LOT of laundry, not just her's but my own, since I can't manage to keep an outfit clean all day on me anymore.  But now laundry isn't as quick of a chore as it used to be, even when the machines are working at the house.  Like everything else I have to time it around feedings and non-fussy times. So far I've been able to keep up with it.

We've ventured out more, just the two of us.  I had to take her to the zoo this week a couple times, so one morning we walked around after I got my work obligations taken care of.  It happened that those days there were a whole bunch of school groups out on field trips (state testing this week so littler kiddos are "kicked out" of the building so it's quieter).  It was a day I was grateful to be staying home instead of teaching.  Otherwise I would've been spending my day either proctoring a test, keeping poor kids silent or constantly doing a headcount in the midst of big crowds.  Keeping track of 1 is enough for me right now. And lifting that heavy stroller and carseat in and out is a workout!

I also got to show Little L off to her dad's co-workers, walked around the mall one evening as a family, and visited her godmother.  Tonight is our first baseball game (my dad will be proud!) and tomorrow the Arboretum.  This kid gets to go to way more places than I did as a baby.

Changes

So how have I spent my day so far?

Folding and hanging laundry on the clothesline. Seeing little onesies flapping in the breeze is one of the cutest things ever.

Made my own granola bars using a recipe on Pinterest. They're cooling right now, so I'm not sure if they were worth the effort or not.

Doing dishes from the cooking.

I did all these things while Little L was in her carrier. Fabulous to be able to use two hands again!

So it got me thinking about how much has changed in the last three years. In April of 2009 I was single, not talking to any guys. I had made a commitment to God a few weeks earlier that I wasn't going to compromise what I really wanted (a strong Catholic man) anymore and if that meant not dating, then so be it. Little did I know that I'd be set up with one two months later, we'd be engaged in less than a year, and pregnant six months after getting married.

Being a stay at home mom was not a goal of mine in college. My mom was one only for my first year, so my role model was a working student who eventually earned her PhD and I wanted to be the same. It wasn't until I started teaching that my mind changed. I loved my job because of the influence I had on children everyday and when the day came for me to have my own, I wanted to devote my energy to my kids instead of someone else's. I'm not judging working moms; many are forced to work to make ends meet and I'm still hoping to do a little of it part-time. But I can't imagine being away from Little L for 10 hours a day and having to work while getting only broken sleep. Do I miss adult interaction and my freedom during the day? A little. But this where God is calling me right now and I have a lot to learn about doing it well.

A few firsts

Little L is already four weeks old today! Last week was Dad's first week back to work so at this point we've settled into a bit of a routine. It was tough for me to get used to being at home with her by myself all day. I will never again take for granted the ability to use both of my hands at the same time. She likes to be held when she's awake so I've had to figure out how to feed myself, go to the bathroom, get dressed, and attempt some chores while lifting an 8 pound person who can't completely support her head.

She also likes to eat. All the time.

So much of our time is spent doing that. I've been working through giving myself grace about my "lack of productivity". I know that I'm being productive, you know, keeping another person alive, but it's not how I'm used to spending my time, filled with activity. My husband has encouraged me trying a couple of things to help make it a little easier.

I started pumping about once a day so that way someone else can feed her. I figured given her appetite she wouldn't have any problems taking a bottle, food is food, and I was right. It's kind of depressing how quick she sucks it down though, when it took me half an hour to fill the thing, and sometimes she's still hungry after that. I'm working on building up a supply so I might be able to be away from her for a couple hours starting next month.

Right now L is asleep inside her sling. One of the things I've been paranoid about is dropping her so I was nervous about using it, afraid she'd fall out. Dad actually used it the first time and showed me how to use it. It does give me a little relief and it is really nice to be able to look down at her while I'm doing stuff; when I hold her she's facing forward.

I've been laying her down on her playmat for a few minutes at a time, that's all she has the patience for. Dad does tummy time with her and on Sunday night she rolled over onto her back three different times! Of course when I tried to record it she wouldn't do it. But it was no fluke, she did it again once last night. Her neck is definitely getting stronger and she does these cute little frog kicks. Such a big girl!

She hasn't slept with us at all for over a week, staying in her swing. We've had two nights in a row where she's stayed asleep for a five hour stretch, a big blessing for Dad when he has to get up for work. Her naps aren't consistent during the day but I'm sleeping enough at night, probably around 7 hours, that I have enough energy during the day. I'd rather use her naptime to get stuff done rather than sleep myself.

I took her out for the first time last week, to a work meeting. Unfortunately I had to drive during rush hour on a Friday evening, lots of stoplights that she was not a fan of. I thought I was going to have to turn around and go home, she was so upset, but eventually she calmed down and was great at the meeting and slept on the way home. Still keeping our outings to a minimum and not taking her anywhere myself unless I have to. Her first restaurant trip was over the weekend and I don't think we'll be doing that again for awhile. She eats really often in the evenings, which makes it difficult for me to eat anyway, let alone in a public place.

I could go on and on about other things we've noticed, how her hair's getting longer, all the funny facial expressions, distinguishing her cries, but that's enough for now. Going to try and lay her down and see if she keeps sleeping.